Things That Could Go Wrong
Born feet-first, kindergarten teacher with the grey tooth and cockroach breath, summer soccer camp rained out, constant erections in sixth-grade math class, summer school, thick glasses, prom night food poisoning, misplaced transcripts, broken femur, no cell reception in cornfield where femur broken, infection from waiting for ambulance to arrive in cornfield where femur broken, diarrhea on date night, car accident, pink slip, grease fire, mauled by pet rottweiler (twice), mauled by pet kitten (once), irregular heartbeat, thinking the class reunion was supposed to be a costume party when it wasn’t, cancer, selective alzheimer’s, spontaneous combustion.
0 Responses to “Life Plan #329”